I'm going to take a little break from the California posts today.
I'll probably end up being a little sappy too, I just have some thoughts on my mind.
Thanksgiving and Christmas are closing in on us, and I, like most of you, don't mind a bit.
I'll probably end up being a little sappy too, I just have some thoughts on my mind.
Thanksgiving and Christmas are closing in on us, and I, like most of you, don't mind a bit.
I absolutely love this time of year.
Honestly, what's not to love?
Twinkling white lights and shiny ornaments are beginning to grace store windows, the end of every grocery store aisle is piled high with holiday scented candles and the exact ingredients required to make a pumpkin pie. The sound of sleigh bells are in the background of every television commercial and Burl Ives, Judy Garland and Bing Crosby classics have begun playing on the radio.
It's the time of year, when a person gets sentimental and nostalgic. It doesn't matter how in tune you are with today's technology and the social media frenzy, or if you've been too busy to cook a homemade meal in the past 11 months so you've been living off of Five Hour Energy and Powerbars, or if your entire life revolves around the detailed schedule on your iPhone...
...people tend to slow down a bit this time of year.
I believe that this time of year, more than any other, is the time when people miss how things used to be. They reminisce more about their childhoods, and the traditions that their families had created when they were younger. They have the urge to recreate these warm memories once again, whether it be simply for themselves, or to pass these heartwarming traditions on to their children. The realization that life flies by too fast is like a slap in the face, and the sudden urgency to slow things down and just "be" together as a family takes precedence. They may look back on regrets that they have, or they may make promises to themselves to make a change for the better, for themselves and their families. Less technology time, more family time.
I am as guilty as the next person when it comes to spending too much time attached to a phone, iPad or my laptop. Most of my tech-time takes places at work during the slow times of the day. I catch up on emails, blogging, updating any of my 3 Facebook pages, etc. Sometimes, I catch myself at home in the evening looking at my phone or opening my laptop to check in on things that I feel just can't wait. Most of the time, I realize that I have exceeded the 5 minute allowance I gave myself to be on one of these devices, and I immediately shut it down and get down on the floor to play with my children. Other times it's my husband who, from across the room, will say something to the effect of
"You are ALWAYS on your phone" or, "Do you really need to do that now?"
I, of course, will get defensive and say something back defending my technological actions along the lines of ...
"Oh geez, I was only on for 10 minutes. I'm done now. You're always on your phone too ya' know..."
And it's true, my husband is just as guilty as myself when it comes to staring at phone, or getting on the iPad for "just a sec"...
I think when we call each other out for using our devices during family time, it's a snarky little way of making ourselves feel better. We know that sending emails or checking Facebook can and should wait until after our children are in bed, and the fact that we just scolded our spouse for it means that we were obviously not on our phone at the time, and therefore were being the "good" parent at that moment. It's a dirty little way of making yourself feel better, but at the same time, you know you've done it too, and you feel bad that you let that little device rule your world as often as it does.
We have all done it.
We all feel guilty about it.
Whether it's time spent ignoring your spouse or children, or just time wasted in general browsing Facebook, Twitter, etc, we get that guilty feeling, that regretful feeling, that sad feeling...
"I'm wasting my precious time staring at this stuff"
But just like any addiction, you go right back to it, saying "one more time", or "just a few more minutes", or "just one quick post"...
This is why I love the Holidays the most.
Sure I love the decorations, the feasts, the movies, the snow, the smells, the general heart warming feeling and that joyous flood of childhood memories, but most of all, I love the slow pace. I love the disconnect from the modern world, and the reconnect with old memories.
As a mother, and still a new one when compared to the long scheme of things, I am beyond excited to watch my children during the Holiday season. They are still very little, and they still aren't really sure what Thanksgiving and Christmas are. They know we eat a lot on Thanksgiving, and they know we will decorate a tree and a jolly man dressed in red named Santa will break into our home on Christmas Eve and leave them toys, but they still aren't exactly sure why...
...and I love that.
I love knowing that, as parents, we are at the very beginning of the road when it comes to creating a world of joy and magic for my children, especially during the Holidays. I believe that creating magic in an otherwise manmade world, is crucial to the development of children. It scares me to my core when I think about my children having cell phones, Facebook accounts, or their own iPad when they are 8, 9, 10, 11 years old. A child at this age, is just that...a child. They should be playing outside, running, getting dirty and exploring, not walking malls, covering themselves in makeup and staring at their phones. I see an incredible amount of children this age, who are walking around as if they are teenagers or adults these days, and it makes me sad. I'm not saying they are bad kids by any means, I just feel like they are missing out on their childhoods, and they won't ever get that back.
I have very fond memories growing up. I was an average kid, just like most of you reading, I'm sure. I played outside, I walked to where I needed to go, I earned an allowance, I wrote stories in notebooks, I explored outside, I drank from a hose, I talked to my friends on the phone that we had hanging on the wall in the kitchen...and the list goes on. I didn't wear makeup until I was 13 and even then it was a tinted lip gloss and a little blush, that's it. I didn't have a cell phone until I was 16 years old when I got a car, and it was only for emergencies.
Don't get me wrong, I know the world has changed since I was a kid. I know the expectations and standards for children have changed as well. But still, this makes me sad.
Last night, after dinner, my husband and I curled up in bed with our two little girls with a big bowl of popcorn and the movie "The Polar Express" in our bed. We turned off the lights and pulled up the covers and as our little ladies watched the movie, my husband and I watched them. At the end of the movie the little boy is given a sleigh bell by Santa Claus himself. It's a moment in the movie that demonstrates the magic and wonder that resides inside of children. At the moment the little boy shook the bell and it made that wonder jingle noise, my husband nudged my arm and whispered for me to look at Lucy's face. The look on her face was of pure fascination and wonder at watching that little boy suddenly believe in the magic of Christmas. Her eyes were wide and bright and her mouth was open with awe. It was one of those moments that I will never forget. Everything she was seeing on that movie screen was real and existed in her world.
Magic was real, miracles were real, and this could all happen to her, just like that little boy,
as long as she believed.
It's moments like these, the moments of purity and sheer amazement, that I hope to continually produce and encourage in my children's lives for years to come. As a mother, I will do everything I can to make sure that my little girls believe in magic, that they lose themselves in play, that they continue to grow their imaginations, and that they never doubt the possibility of miracles.
We as parents will do our very best to create memories for our children that will stick with them, front and center in their minds, for the rest of their lives. I never want to regret not making the most of a moment for them, and more importantly, I never want them to feel like their childhoods were anything less than incredible. When they grow older and have children of their own, I want to strive to recreate these wonderful moments with their own children.
The Farmhouse that we are building is more than just new house. It will be a whole new life for us and for our girls. We spent 3 years searching for the perfect house plan. The kind of house that you would want to grow up in. The kind of house they will come home to spend Christmas with us in. The kind of house that gives you a hug whenever you walk through its doors. In addition to the house, we will have the wide open space. They will be able to run, explore, raise animals, ride horses, chase chickens, run through sprinklers, pick blossoms from the trees, ride bikes and so much more, all in the safety of our own wide open space.
As many parents do, we have a vision for our children. We dream of being the perfect parent who gives them the perfect childhood fully stocked with the best of memories and this holiday season I will be making a true effort and pledge to myself to put down the phone, to close the laptop and to stop wasting my time reading my news feed in order to make these memories happen for them.
None of those other things matter.
Living life to its fullest, spending precious time with my family and keeping their lives full of joy and wonder is my number one goal this Holiday season, as well as for the days that follow.
You won't be missing out on anything if you begin ignoring your phone, iPad, Facebook, etc....
...after all, you spend hours upon hours with those devices, but when's the last time they smiled back or gave you a big hug for it?
Have a wonderful Holiday Season with those who matter most.
:) Ashley
I am as guilty as the next person when it comes to spending too much time attached to a phone, iPad or my laptop. Most of my tech-time takes places at work during the slow times of the day. I catch up on emails, blogging, updating any of my 3 Facebook pages, etc. Sometimes, I catch myself at home in the evening looking at my phone or opening my laptop to check in on things that I feel just can't wait. Most of the time, I realize that I have exceeded the 5 minute allowance I gave myself to be on one of these devices, and I immediately shut it down and get down on the floor to play with my children. Other times it's my husband who, from across the room, will say something to the effect of
"You are ALWAYS on your phone" or, "Do you really need to do that now?"
I, of course, will get defensive and say something back defending my technological actions along the lines of ...
"Oh geez, I was only on for 10 minutes. I'm done now. You're always on your phone too ya' know..."
And it's true, my husband is just as guilty as myself when it comes to staring at phone, or getting on the iPad for "just a sec"...
I think when we call each other out for using our devices during family time, it's a snarky little way of making ourselves feel better. We know that sending emails or checking Facebook can and should wait until after our children are in bed, and the fact that we just scolded our spouse for it means that we were obviously not on our phone at the time, and therefore were being the "good" parent at that moment. It's a dirty little way of making yourself feel better, but at the same time, you know you've done it too, and you feel bad that you let that little device rule your world as often as it does.
We have all done it.
We all feel guilty about it.
Whether it's time spent ignoring your spouse or children, or just time wasted in general browsing Facebook, Twitter, etc, we get that guilty feeling, that regretful feeling, that sad feeling...
"I'm wasting my precious time staring at this stuff"
But just like any addiction, you go right back to it, saying "one more time", or "just a few more minutes", or "just one quick post"...
This is why I love the Holidays the most.
Sure I love the decorations, the feasts, the movies, the snow, the smells, the general heart warming feeling and that joyous flood of childhood memories, but most of all, I love the slow pace. I love the disconnect from the modern world, and the reconnect with old memories.
As a mother, and still a new one when compared to the long scheme of things, I am beyond excited to watch my children during the Holiday season. They are still very little, and they still aren't really sure what Thanksgiving and Christmas are. They know we eat a lot on Thanksgiving, and they know we will decorate a tree and a jolly man dressed in red named Santa will break into our home on Christmas Eve and leave them toys, but they still aren't exactly sure why...
...and I love that.
I love knowing that, as parents, we are at the very beginning of the road when it comes to creating a world of joy and magic for my children, especially during the Holidays. I believe that creating magic in an otherwise manmade world, is crucial to the development of children. It scares me to my core when I think about my children having cell phones, Facebook accounts, or their own iPad when they are 8, 9, 10, 11 years old. A child at this age, is just that...a child. They should be playing outside, running, getting dirty and exploring, not walking malls, covering themselves in makeup and staring at their phones. I see an incredible amount of children this age, who are walking around as if they are teenagers or adults these days, and it makes me sad. I'm not saying they are bad kids by any means, I just feel like they are missing out on their childhoods, and they won't ever get that back.
I have very fond memories growing up. I was an average kid, just like most of you reading, I'm sure. I played outside, I walked to where I needed to go, I earned an allowance, I wrote stories in notebooks, I explored outside, I drank from a hose, I talked to my friends on the phone that we had hanging on the wall in the kitchen...and the list goes on. I didn't wear makeup until I was 13 and even then it was a tinted lip gloss and a little blush, that's it. I didn't have a cell phone until I was 16 years old when I got a car, and it was only for emergencies.
Don't get me wrong, I know the world has changed since I was a kid. I know the expectations and standards for children have changed as well. But still, this makes me sad.
Last night, after dinner, my husband and I curled up in bed with our two little girls with a big bowl of popcorn and the movie "The Polar Express" in our bed. We turned off the lights and pulled up the covers and as our little ladies watched the movie, my husband and I watched them. At the end of the movie the little boy is given a sleigh bell by Santa Claus himself. It's a moment in the movie that demonstrates the magic and wonder that resides inside of children. At the moment the little boy shook the bell and it made that wonder jingle noise, my husband nudged my arm and whispered for me to look at Lucy's face. The look on her face was of pure fascination and wonder at watching that little boy suddenly believe in the magic of Christmas. Her eyes were wide and bright and her mouth was open with awe. It was one of those moments that I will never forget. Everything she was seeing on that movie screen was real and existed in her world.
Magic was real, miracles were real, and this could all happen to her, just like that little boy,
as long as she believed.
It's moments like these, the moments of purity and sheer amazement, that I hope to continually produce and encourage in my children's lives for years to come. As a mother, I will do everything I can to make sure that my little girls believe in magic, that they lose themselves in play, that they continue to grow their imaginations, and that they never doubt the possibility of miracles.
We as parents will do our very best to create memories for our children that will stick with them, front and center in their minds, for the rest of their lives. I never want to regret not making the most of a moment for them, and more importantly, I never want them to feel like their childhoods were anything less than incredible. When they grow older and have children of their own, I want to strive to recreate these wonderful moments with their own children.
The Farmhouse that we are building is more than just new house. It will be a whole new life for us and for our girls. We spent 3 years searching for the perfect house plan. The kind of house that you would want to grow up in. The kind of house they will come home to spend Christmas with us in. The kind of house that gives you a hug whenever you walk through its doors. In addition to the house, we will have the wide open space. They will be able to run, explore, raise animals, ride horses, chase chickens, run through sprinklers, pick blossoms from the trees, ride bikes and so much more, all in the safety of our own wide open space.
As many parents do, we have a vision for our children. We dream of being the perfect parent who gives them the perfect childhood fully stocked with the best of memories and this holiday season I will be making a true effort and pledge to myself to put down the phone, to close the laptop and to stop wasting my time reading my news feed in order to make these memories happen for them.
None of those other things matter.
Living life to its fullest, spending precious time with my family and keeping their lives full of joy and wonder is my number one goal this Holiday season, as well as for the days that follow.
You won't be missing out on anything if you begin ignoring your phone, iPad, Facebook, etc....
...after all, you spend hours upon hours with those devices, but when's the last time they smiled back or gave you a big hug for it?
Have a wonderful Holiday Season with those who matter most.
:) Ashley
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