Top 10 New Years Eve Blunders

Happy Saturday to you fine folks out here in the blogosphere.

 

My lovely helper Shayla has the day off today, so I am here alone at the bakery, listening to an overly dramatic Lifetime Movie playing in the kitchen and watching the cars drive by....

 

....I suppose I could go do those dishes...

later....

 

I have invaluable advice to give!

 

So, as we all know, New Years Eve is just days away.  I'm sure many of you are planning parties, making reservations, planning out your sexy outfits and searching high and low for a babysitter who is willing to give up their NYE activities in exchange for a fat paycheck from you.

 

Good Luck with that.

 

My husband and I have decided that unless we are invited to a party that is nearby and that is also kiddo friendly, then we will most likely be spending the 31st in the comfort of our very own Arachnid Manor (which, honestly this time of year, turns more into the Rodent Resort) with our two little ladies, a bowl of popcorn, a mountain of blankets and a good animated feature flick. We will all be in bed by 8:30, sleeping soundly, dreaming of the year to come, with nary a hangover from hell in sight.

 

However, I'm not naïve to the fact that not everyone finds tickle monsters, minions, and floor picnics particularly exciting, so for you singles out there who will be gracing the NYE party scene with your sexy swaggin' self, please plan your night wisely and accordingly.

Bad, hasty, decision making can often escalate quickly, and may lead to any of the following regretful occurrences...

Top 10 "Oh Crap..." New Years Eve Blunders 

 

1. A 3 day hangover that could take down a Rhino

2. Acting like a sloppy, slurring train wreck in front of your date, or worse, your ex and their date.

3. A bright and shiny new neck tattoo

4. Drunk texting (as permanent as your new ink, don't forget)

5. Waking up someone's "Old Lady"

6. $37 worth of Taco Bell that will inevitably make it down between your car seats and stink 'til May.

7. Gambling away your tuition money

8.  4-6 weeks of antibiotics

9. Getting back to together with your "huge mistake of an ex"...

10. A baby

I hope that all sank in and took firm root in your ole' decision maker...

For you married and attached folks out there... If you and your significant other do decide to drop off the kids and go out to party it up for the first time in "forever", then make sure you down plenty of water in between drinks to prevent your brain from going stupid and making some downright irresponsible decisions...

 

...just because you are married with children doesn't mean you are exempt from any of the possibilities in the list above....

 

...well, hopefully 5,8, and 9 would be out of the question...

 

...but 10...

 

...be careful...

 

.....otherwise your outrageous New Years Eve babysitter fees will be doubled next year.

 

Catch my drift?

 

So, in conclusion, regardless if you are young, single and already conditioned to the "up all night" partying lifestyle of Miley, Kesha and the Beebs, or if you are married, matured and your typical party includes screaming toddlers and giant talking rat...it doesn't matter....

 

 You must practice safe partying, people.

 

Wait until later in the evening before having that first drink, practice self control, and go home once the big, glittery ball has dropped...

 

...afterall, no one wants to be the out of control, slurring, stumbling mess who mistakingly Snapchats their dad from a bar bathroom at 3:00am.

 

Happy New Years!

 

 

 

 :) Ashley